We’re moving.

At this point, we aren’t quite sure where, but we’re definitely moving. Boxes are being packed, excess clutter is being donated, our things are being consolidated. It’s a very stressful time. Not only for the adults involved, who are combing through home listings, researching schools, calculating drive time from work and friends… but it’s also stressful for any children involved.

I know that my child can sense our stress. He knows we’re moving, we’ve talked about it many times. I do my best to reassure him that things will be wonderful when we finally own a house of our own, but to him, this is a very scary change. And my poor kidlet has been through a lot of change in the past few years.

One might say,  “well, you should be used to it by now,” but that’s not really true, is it? We never truly get used to change. We might adapt to it, we might learn from it and become more resilient and flexible. But I wouldn’t say that we get “used to it”.

It’s easy to forget, in these times that are stressful for parents, that our children might be stressed too. Oftentimes, my child tends to whine or lash out when he is feeling overwhelmed and stressed. Sometimes, on days when I become too overwhelmed myself, I forget that this behavior comes from a place of fear and stress and I get frustrated.

Of course, this is absolutely counterproductive, so we have come up with a family transition ritual. As always, we make this ritual as elaborate or as simple as we feel.

 


Family Ritual for Accepting and Welcoming Change

Supplies

Rose Quartz for each family member

Candle for each family member

Amethyst for each family member

Paper for each family member

Crayons, pencils, or any writing utensil

Parental supervision highly recommended.

Before we begin , I explain to my family that the rose quartz represents our love for each other and that the amethyst, which can often be used for various types of protection, represents the protection that we, as a family, offer each other.

 

  1. Arrange the rose quartz and the amethyst in a circle.
  2. Place the candles, close to the circle of crystals, in front of each family member (please use caution with young children. You can choose to omit actual candles and use flameless ones instead, they’re for symbolism).
  3. Begin the ritual in the ways of your tradition.
  4. Give each family member a piece of paper and instruct them to write or draw their hopes for the future and how they feel this change could affect their lives, positively.
  5. Have everyone fold their paper up, and place the paper in the middle of the crystal circle.
  6. Light the candles and say (or substitute with whatever feels right):
  7. “Our family is filled with love and strength,
    Let these crystals amplify our love and strength through this difficult change.
    Each candle represents the light of our commitment to each other,
    See how the light fills the circle?
    Let the light of our family bond keep us stable and safe.
    May we always remember how it feels to put our arms around each other.
    Let this change allow us to grow in love and light and bring only positivity into our lives.”
  8. Everyone blows out (or turns off) their candles, imagining their love spreading over the entire family. 
  9. End the ritual as suits your tradition. 
  10. Take the pieces of paper, wrap them with ribbon, and store them in an easy to reach place. 
  11. Have each family member take their crystals and place them in a safe place in the room that belongs to them. 
  12. Revisit and talk about them after the change has passed.


Bright Blessings,

Rowan